


This Stupid Love

by twelvefifteen



Series: i'm no hero (will you love me as i am?) [1]
Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Established Relationship, Fluff, Kinda, M/M, Pining, i dont want to spoil anything, kinda on the college au tag too, seokmin and seungcheol are mentioned, soonyoung has one line
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-19 07:55:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,452
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18133001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/twelvefifteen/pseuds/twelvefifteen
Summary: Anything for you.(Hansol is in love with Seungkwan, but he doesn't have the guts to say it so he conveys it through his actions instead.)





	This Stupid Love

**Author's Note:**

> title is from stupid love by dan and shay. the song quoted in this fic is lemonade by jeremy passion (changed the pronouns in the lyrics to match the fic).
> 
> enjoy!

_(He's my sunshine in the rain_

_My Tylenol when I'm in pain, yeah_ _  
_

Let me tell you what he means to me)

 

It's a Saturday and Hansol finds himself in the same bed as Seungkwan.

He watches the small rise and fall of the other's chest as he listens to the dull whirring of the old aircon in his boyfriend's room.

It's unusual. Seungkwan always wakes up before him, and he ends up always opening his eyes to the other's bright smile, but maybe this day is something different.

His heart thuds against his chest. Maybe today _is_ different.

It's only been a few weeks since they became official. Hansol internally cringes as he unconsciously recalls his outburst of a confession. It was awkward, and can be described as an unplanned event. But it made Seungkwan happy and it made him laugh a lot, so maybe embarrassing himself was okay.

Hansol reaches a finger to gently trace against his boyfriend's soft cheek. It feels smooth against the pad of his thumb and he chuckles, remembering how Seungkwan always chides him about skin care routines.

Warmth blooms in his chest and he feels it travel all the way to his stomach, and suddenly he feels giddy. Like a vine to a branch, he slowly wraps his arm around Seungkwan's waist and he buries his face in the crook of his neck. He inhales quietly and lets out a small sigh. He feels content and relaxed. He feels complete.

After a few more seconds of inhaling his boyfriend's scent, he carefully untangles himself and climbs out of bed.

He decides to make Seungkwan breakfast. After all, he stole the time the latter reserved for studying and he doesn't want to be that much of a bother.

Hansol strides to the kitchen as he hums a song to himself. He feels unusually happy today. Maybe it's in the way the sun's rays flit in between the cracks of the curtains, or maybe it's in the way he easily spots the pack of instant coffee in one of the kitchen cabinets without him having to ask Seungkwan.

He heats water and grabs Seungkwan's favorite mug as he continues to hum to himself.

Maybe he should make french toast today.

He grabs a pair of eggs from the refrigerator and is about to grab the loaves of bread from the counter when he trips over nothing. He drops the eggs to the floor and he groans in pain as his knee hit the wooden tiles.

“Fuck,” he hisses and when he looks up, he sees the mess he created.

Just when he thought that today would be a good day.

Apparently, the fiasco wakes Seungkwan up and Hansol's vision is suddenly filled with his boyfriend's worried expression.

“Hey, what happened?” Seungkwan asks, his voice still croaky from sleep. His hair is mussed, strands sticking up in different places, and his face is bloated but Hansol thinks he's beautiful.

He lets out a small laugh at his stupidity and shakes his head. “I tripped and I made a mess. Your floor is egg-y now.”

“Egg-y?” Seungkwan raises a brow and looks around, his mouth forming into an 'o’ as he takes in his surroundings. A laugh bubbles up in his throat.

Hansol just stares at him with a fond smile.

“Were you trying to make breakfast?”

“Yup.”

“But why?”

Hansol shrugs. “I wanted to cook you breakfast. That's all.”

“But why?” Seungkwan repeats as he helps Hansol stand up. They both clean up the mess the latter created.

“I told you. Just because.”

Seungkwan shakes his head in what Hansol thinks might be amusement and the former nudges his shoulder. “You didn't have to.”

Hansol washes his hands and dries them off with a paper towel before facing his boyfriend. He looks at him with adoration in his eyes. “But I want to.”

He sees pink travel to Seungkwan's cheeks and he feels the warmth he felt when he woke up bloom once again inside his chest.

“You didn't have to,” Seungkwan repeats, mumbling this time. He looks away and throws the egg shells in the trash bin.

Hansol steals a kiss on his cheek. “Let's just go to Mcdonalds then!”

Seungkwan, his ears a bright shade of red, turns to him with a wide grin and nods. “Your treat because you made a mess in my kitchen.”

Hansol laughs. “Anything for you.”

Maybe he can try making breakfast for Seungkwan again some other time.

 

 

 

_(Like a tall glass of lemonade_

_When it's burning hot on summer days_ _  
_

He's exactly what I need)

 

“I’m thirsty,” Seungkwan groans.

It's thirty more minutes until class ends, and Hansol stares at the digital clock on his phone as he slumps his head on the table. Their professor has been droning on about ethics for two hours now and he just wants to leave.

“I'm thirsty,” Seungkwan repeats, his voice closer to Hansol's ear.

Hansol sits up and looks at his pouty boyfriend. “Did you already finish your water?”

The other nods, his lower lip jutting out even more.

Hansol rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “Just a few more minutes, babe.”

“But my throat is parched,” his boyfriend continues to whine.

“Drink your saliva.”

“I tried, and it didn't help.”

Hansol chuckles and pokes his boyfriend's cheek. “What do you want me to do?”

“Pretend you're sick so we can get out of here.”

“There's just a few minutes left!”

Seungkwan leans his head against Hansol's shoulder and fake cries. “But I feel like dying.”

“We can just leave, you know? It's not like we're still in high school.”

“But this professor won't just allow that.”

Hansol lets out a sigh. That's true.

“Okay, fine,” he says and quietly slaps his cheeks. Here goes nothing.

Hansol wretches out a cough and he lets out a few more loud coughs. He feels like his throat is going to come out any second now. He sees their professor's eyes on him, and from his peripheral view, he sees Seungkwan trying to stifle out a laugh.

The whole class turns to look at him and he wants the earth to just open up and swallow him whole.

“Is everything okay, Mr. Chwe?”

He tries to form an excuse but he feels something get stuck in his throat and he gags.

“I think he needs to go to the bathroom, Sir,” Seungkwan says in his stead as he tries to pat down his heaving chest. He might have forced too much coughs.

“Oh, that's okay. I was about to dismiss the class.” The professor says, his face wary of the fiasco that just occurred.

Hansol turns to look at Seungkwan in surprise and the latter hides his face in his hands as he tries to stop his laughter.

The professor dismisses the class a few minutes early and everyone happily leaves the room at their own pace, not forgetting to look at Hansol weirdly as they pass by him

A few more minutes later, it's just the two of them left alone in the room.

Seungkwan lets out the laugh he was trying to stop and he falls on the floor while clutching on Hansol's arm. “This is so gold,” he says in between giggles.

“What the fuck just happened,” Hansol says, his voice strained. He rubs his throat and groans because of the pain.

“We should listen in class, Sol-ah so we know when our prof is about to dismiss us,” Seungkwan says as he looks up at his boyfriend with a wide grin. His face is flushed and his eyes are shining, and Hansol wants to be angry but he couldn't—not when Seungkwan looks like _this._

“I can't believe I did that for nothing.”

Hands are placed on top of his knees. “I'm sorry,” Seungkwan apologizes, but his expression is still filled with mischievousness.

Hansol sighs and shakes his head. He actually finds it funny too.

“Anything for you,” he says. “Now let's get you that water.”

 

 

 

_(He's my smile when I'm feeling blue_

_He's my good night sleep when my day is through yeah_ _  
_

Let me tell you what he means to me)

 

Hansol runs a hand through his hair as a small groan escapes his lips. From his peripheral view, he could see Seungkwan constantly look at him in worry but he didn't have the energy to explain his misery.

“You okay?” his boyfriend asks.

They are currently in Hansol’s room, the latter studying for a major exam in his study table while Seungkwan is playing with his phone on his bed.

“Mm,” he mumbles out before burying his face on his desk, his face squished against his scattered notes on the wooden table.

Hansol loves the company, but there are times when he wishes he’s alone so he could wallow at his idiocy all by himself. Or maybe he just didn't want to appear like such a loser in front of the very person he wants to impress.

It was a long debate with himself, but he ended up inviting Seungkwan over even when he had to study. He told his boyfriend it would be a study date but it ended up with Seungkwan finishing his homework early and him suffering over his long notes and recorded lectures for hours.

He wants to impress Seungkwan by showing how good of a student he is, but apparently he forgot that this upcoming exam is one of his weakest points.

Suddenly, he feels arms wrap around his shoulders and he unconsciously lets out a satisfied sigh. Straightening his back, he extends his head so he could look up at his boyfriend. He sees nothing but pure understanding in the other's eyes.

Seungkwan presses a kiss on the tip of his nose and positions his boyfriend's head properly so his neck won't get strained.

“I know you don't want to talk about it so I'll just be here and cuddle you until you be okay again,” Seungkwan says as he rests his chin on the top of his head.

Hansol wraps his fingers around his boyfriend's wrists and pulls him closer. What did he do to deserve such an understanding boyfriend.

He leaves soft kisses against the spot where Seungkwan's pulse can be felt and turns his head to look at him, a soft smile on his face. “I’m sorry for dragging you here,” he says. “You must be bored.”

Seungkwan looks beautiful again today, and Hansol gets distracted. His eyes travel from his bright eyes, to his button nose, to his tiny ears, and to his soft lips, leaving faint traces of pink across Seungkwan's cheeks.

Something pulls at his heart and he feels his chest constrict as he continues to look at Seungkwan. He feels breathless and there are three words at the tip of his tongue he badly wants to say but his mind tells him no and he gets scared.

The sides of Seungkwan's mouth lift up to form a beautiful smile and he leans in to press a chaste kiss against Hansol's lips.

“I'm not,” he chuckles. “It's fun watching you study and I like the comfortable silence. You just doing your thing, while I do mine.”

“Really?” Hansol looks at him, confusion painted on his face. “What is enjoyable about watching me suffer as I study?”

A small laugh bubbles up Seungkwan's throat and he leans in to press another kiss on Hansol's lips. “It's cute, and I get to see different sides of you I haven't seen before.”

“I look like an idiot,” Hansol whines.

“You’re my idiot.”

Hansol scoffs. “Fine.” He returns his boyfriend's kisses with a peck on his cheek. “Thank you, Boo.”

“Anything for you,” Seungkwan whispers in reply, a fond smile on his face.

 

 

 

_(Kinda like the feeling after your first kiss_

_Except that everyday he makes me feel like this_

_He's exactly what I need)_

 

Seungkwan is asleep on his lap, his legs folded and the side of his face resting against Hansol's shoulder. He feels soft breaths against his neck and the small puffs of air leave goosebumps on his skin.

His hand rub against Seungkwan's clothed back and he leans his head on top of the other's as he reaches to exit the netflix series that is playing on his laptop.

It's Netflix night but Seungkwan just had an all-nighter so he fell asleep halfway of the episode they were watching, and Hansol didn't want to continue the series without the other. He internally laughs as he imagines Seungkwan's betrayed face if he did continue watching as the other slept.

He reaches for his jacket that he left on his couch and drapes it over Seungkwan's back. He didn't want to carry the other to his bed and risk waking him up. Maybe he can do that after a few hours. He just really wants Seungkwan to get back the hours of sleep that he lost.

His fingers reach up to gently run through chestnut-colored hair and he watches as Seungkwan's eyelashes softly flutter against his cheeks. A smile appears on Hansol's face and he leans in to place a kiss on his boyfriend's forehead.

He feels flower buds bloom inside his chest and he suddenly feels warm, his heart filling up with nothing but happiness.

Hansol cups Seungkwan's cheek and rubs small circles against his skin using his thumb. He memorizes the rhythm of Seungkwan's breaths as they come out at small increments through his slightly parted mouth, and he lets out a small chuckle as his boyfriend cutely scrunches his nose in his sleep.

What is he dreaming about?

He wants to hug Seungkwan tightly and to never let go, but he's afraid to wake up the other. An unexplainable feeling tugs at his chest and he looks at Seungkwan fondly, his heart beating fast at the picture in front of him.

These small moments mean a lot to him, and he's glad that he was able to muster up the courage and confess to Seungkwan because if he didn't, he won't ever experience this kind of unexplainable happiness.

He recalls the times he pined over his boyfriend, letting cowardice take over his want to approach the other. It lasted for a few months, but those are just memories now, and he can only laugh at them whenever he remembers. Seungkwan likes teasing him about those moments too.

Seungkwan shifts in his sleep and Hansol lets him adjust his position, the former burying his face even more into the crook of his neck. Laughter rumbles against his throat and Seungkwan whines, patting Hansol on the chest so he won't move.

Hansol rolls his eyes in nothing but fondness before mumbling, “Anything for you, Seungkwan.”

 

 

_(He's soothing like_ _the ocean rushing on the sand_

_He takes care of me baby_

_He helps me be a better man)_  

 

“What happened to your hair?”

Hansol looks up from eating his lunch and he watches as Seungkwan takes the seat beside him. He is greeted with a kiss on his cheek.

Hansol's hair is weirdly curled in different directions and he really doesn't care, but Seungkwan definitely did; thus the discussion.

He purses his lips and decides to humor his boyfriend. “I don't know. I tried combing it down, but it won't budge.” Of course he didn't do any of those.

Seungkwan looks at him with deadpan eyes. “You didn't shower.” A statement, not a question. Hansol wants to laugh at how Seungkwan knows him too well.

“I woke up late!” he says as he continues to shove rice into his mouth.

“Ew,” Seungkwan jokes. “I don't want to sit and eat with you.”

Hansol laughs, his eyes crinkling at the sides. He leans his head against Seungkwan's shoulder for a while before continuing to eat his lunch. “I took a bath before I slept yesterday, don't worry.”

“Still ew,” Seungkwan mumbles as he reaches up to try and pat down Hansol's unruly hair. “It really won't budge.” He laughs and runs his fingers through the messy locks instead.

“Told you.” He grins at his boyfriend, scrunching his nose to tease the other.

He sees Seungkwan roll his eyes, humming in content as the other continues to run his fingers through his hair. He finishes eating and pushes his now empty tray to the other side of the table so he could place his arms on the cold surface.

“What do you wanna eat?” Hansol asks as he leans more into his boyfriend's touch.

“'M not hungry,” Seungkwan mumbles before giving up on Hansol's mess of a hair and instead gets his bag.

“You ate too much for breakfast, didn't you!” Hansol jokes as he peeks on what Seungkwan is doing. The latter is rummaging his bag for something, and Hansol is curious to see what the other is looking for.

“I ate breakfast late and it was the usual amount, thank you very much.” Seungkwan pulls out a beanie from his bag and brushes Hansol's fringe away before slipping the beanie around his head.

Hansol looks at him with raised eyebrows, surprised by the sudden action.

Seungkwan just shakes his head in amusement and pats his boyfriend's cheeks. “You left it at my dorm. Good thing I brought it today. Problem solved.”

A bright grin shows on Seungkwan's face, and Hansol can't help but laugh in disbelief. Leave it to Seungkwan to always be there in times of trouble.

“You're a lifesaver,” Hansol says, his eyes shining with pure adoration for the other.

Seungkwan winks and squishes his cheeks. “Anything for you, babe.”

 

 

_(He's so beautiful,_

_sometimes I stop to close my eyes_

_He's exactly what I need)_

 

Hansol wakes up to the sound of Seokmin's raucous laughter.

He groans and reaches for his phone to look at the time, squinting at the brightness of his monitor.

It's 8:03 AM. Why are they so noisy this early in the morning?

“Hansol, wake up,” Soonyoung says as he enters their shared room. “We have to go to hair and makeup in twenty minutes.” He grabs his baseball cap from his bed before leaving again.

The sun's rays flit through the cracks of the curtains and Hansol feels the familiarity of it all. He rubs at his sleep-laden eyes and lays on bed for a good five seconds as he stares at the blank ceiling.

Did he just dream about him and Seungkwan being in an established relationship?

He feels his face warm up. His heart starts to beat erratically within his chest and his stomach suddenly feels uncomfortable. He wants to close his eyes and go back to sleep.

He hears footsteps pad the floor near his bed and he wishes it to be Soonyoung just waking him up again, but when he turns his head to look at the newcomer, he sees Seungkwan with his bright eyes and pouty lips.

“Wake up, sleepyhead,” Seungkwan says as he reaches down to ruffle Hansol's hair. “Seungcheol hyung told me to get you up. He woke you up thirty minutes ago but you wouldn't budge.”

Hansol lets out a groan as he sits up. Sighing, he lets his eyes travel the expanse of Seungkwan's face, using his sleepiness as an excuse to stare at the other. It seems like the other just showered and Hansol can smell his lavender-scented shampoo.

“Hey, Sol-ah, wake up.” Seungkwan squishes Hansol's cheeks and rolls his palm as he kneads them, letting out a small laugh in the process.

“Sheungkwan shtop,” Hansol mumbles, his words coming out muffled.

Seungkwan laughs even more and pats his cheek before standing up. “Wake up before Seungcheol hyung drags you out himself,” he says before leaving the room.

Hansol sighs as he watches Seungkwan leave. His heart is still thudding against his chest and his dream replays in his head. If he's going to be honest, he's scared. He's been harboring feelings for his bandmate for a few years now and he didn't have any plans on admitting it to Seungkwan.

He is a coward, and he admits to that.

The silent stares, the quiet laughter, and the occasional glances. He wishes the dream he had is real. He hopes that Seungkwan loves him back. He badly wants Seungkwan in his arms. He desperately _craves_ for Seungkwan's attention.

But he's scared, and he doesn't want to tarnish their friendship.

But after that dream—

He takes a deep breath and lets out another sigh.

He'll risk it. Who knows, maybe it might end up well?

He crawls out of bed and looks back at the door which Seungkwan left open.

Maybe it will work?

What if it works?

Hansol whispers, “Anything for you.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> please don't kill me.
> 
> also, special thanks to nic and pam for reading this before i posted it.
> 
> been wanting to write verkwan so here we go! my first verkwan and ao3 fic ever.
> 
> kudos and comments are appreciated ❤️
> 
> curiouscat: hoonsols


End file.
